Veggie Lo Mein

Ready before you can say "fried rice":

It goes without saying that almost every college student has a special dependency on takeout. For most of us, the takeout of choice is Chinese. We grub up those saucy noodles or sweet and tangy rice at all hours and with little regard for decency. For me, there has always been something mystical about eating dumplings with a plastic fork right out of the container. It is quintessential college perfection as far as cuisine is concerned: tasty, accessible, cheap and perfect hot or cold. The only problem... the waiting! This recipe is ready in about 20 minutes.

Why haven't I put up a post about fried rice or General Tso's in four months? Well, to be honest, since moving home my takeout consumption has lessened greatly. But, more importantly, I hadn't convinced myself to buy a few essential ingredients just yet. Maybe it was the heat, maybe it was destiny. Whatever it was I broke down yesterday.

This week mushrooms were on sale at the Giant. I love those hibachi style stir-fried mushrooms so I was itching to cook each and every one of them! A brief Internet search resulted in a recipe for "Stir-Fried Noodles with Eggplant and Basil" by Everyday Food. The photo looked great, ingredients were accessible and the reviews were positive. Although the original recipe used eggplant, mushrooms and zucchini were listed as delicious substitutes.

I was only missing one thing: sesame oil (toasted). So, after work I hopped down the street to get a bottle. I spotted the stuff immediately; cafe-au-lait colored and sporting a red label. But the site suggested "toasted" sesame and this was just the plain Jane original. I did find a bottle of "toasted" sesame oil but it was $7.99!? The plain version was only $2.99. Need I tell you which one went home with ME?

The minute I opened the bottle I was slightly regretful for not buying the fancier stuff. It smelled so toasty and so much like dozens of sushi dinner-dates I was immediatly seduced into paying whatever price next time. My advice: settle for the plain sesame oil if you're skeptical but, once you've tried it, dish out the green for the upgrade. You will only use a little at a time so it will last for a while. But, the flavor, even of a cheap brand, is really irreplaceable in Asian food so make sure you don't skip it! I nixed most of the zucchini and doubled up on mushrooms in the recipe because, well, the mushrooms were really, really good!

Note on Ingredients:

Lo mein noodles are great if you can find them. If not, linguine or fettuccine noodles are a handy substitute. I used cellophane noodles because I had some. I've only ever had them fried or in small quantities so I was a little grossed out when I pulled yards of it all limp and wormy looking from the pot. They were great cold the next day but I would still suggest the fettuccine or other Asian style noodles. Although I don't condone it, Ramen could work as well. I've doubled the sauce recipe so it makes a little more than you need for this but it was sooo good, and simple, I think you'll want some on hand to toss with your leftovers the next day.

NEVER: rinse mushrooms. Use a paper towel or damp cloth and wipe gently to remove dirt. The stems should pop right out.

Ingredients:
Serves 2

4 ounces lo mein noodles (or linguine or Ramen)
2 tablespoon soy sauce
2 tablespoon sesame oil
1 teaspoon brown sugar
2 tablespoons vegetable oil
1/2 cup zucchini, chopped
2 cups sliced portabello mushrooms
3 scallions
1 clove fresh garlic (or 1/2 teaspoon pre-chopped)
1/4 cup fresh basil leaves or 1/4 teaspoon chili flakes

Preparation:
1. Bring a pot of water to boil over high heat. Cook your noodle of choice according to the package directions. Drain and set aside.

2. In a small bowl mix your brown sugar, sesame oil and soy sauce. Set aside.

3. Wash and dry the zucchini. Split in half lengthwise (the halves will look like half moons) and then again. Cut crosswise and set aside.

4. Wipe the mushrooms with a damp towel to remove dirt. Discard the stems. Cut to preferred size either in slices or quarters. Remove the roots from your scallions and discard. Slice scallions thinly, reserving the whites.

5. Heat a large non-stick skillet to medium high. Be sure to let it preheat for a few minutes. You want it good and hot. When the pan is preheated add the oil (it shouldn't smoke but should be rippling on the surface of the pan).

6. Add the mushrooms and zucchini and cook 4 minutes, stirring until the veggies are slightly golden. Push the veggies to one side.

7. Add the garlic and scallion whites only. Toss for 30 seconds and then stir all the veggies together again. Add the noodles and, at the last minute, the sauce and the rest of the scallions. Heat through for another 30 seconds.

8. Serve immediatly with torn or chopped fresh basil and/or chili flakes.

Chef Salad for Two

+ Thousand Island Dressing:

I'll never forget the lonely, nervous feeling I had the first few hours of being alone on campus as a freshman. One of my first dining hall meals was a chef salad from the refrigerator case at the campus convenience store. My high school was small and since we didn't have a hot bar in the cafeteria we always brought our lunches or ordered pizza. The idea of eating my first college meal alone in a dining hall that could easy feed 250 was very nearly lethal.

So, instead I shoveled nests of salty lunch meat around a bed of iceberg lettuce, wondering if I was going to get food poisoning. It would be worth it though, I told myself, not to be a social outcast less than 24 hours into my college career. Of course, I was being ridiculous. By the end of the my second week I was blossoming beside my dorm mates at a table in D-hall, my timid first days completely forgotten. Since then, Chef salads have had a special place in my heart, and rightly so! Done well, it is the perfect salad.

Standing in the dark air conditioned sanctuary of our kitchen today I couldn't bear eating anything warm. Even the scrumptious turkey burger waiting in the fridge couldn't begin to tempt me. A cool, chilled salad was about all I had on my radar. But while seeding a tomato I couldn't help but lament the reputation Chef salads have across campuses world wide: tasteless iceberg lettuce, grainy tomato wedges, those hideous imitation bacon crumbles. Of course, the traditional salad, with wedges of chilled pink tongue and French dressing, isn't a dream either in my book. For me a simple, icy cold salad needs little more than a good deli sandwich: meat, cheese, lettuce and tomato and a perfectly in season sweet onion. This simplified version of a Chef salad, resplendent with an even simpler homemade dressing, is just the thing to make up for all those disappointing dining hall experiences. Serve it as a side or as a light, refreshing summer main course.

Note on Ingredients:
This dressing is probably the easiest dressing you'll come across. Omit the milk and you have the perfect dip for grilled shrimp, veggies or a spread for your next toasty Ruben. As a dressing it costs mere pennies to make and is the perfect choice for your next cook out (or the next time you have an excess of refugee condiments clogging up your fridge). Be sure to splurge and buy some good quality deli meet. You can buy small packages in the deli section of deli style meats and cheeses. If you don't like Swiss try Provolone and smoked turkey. Add the tomatoes at the last minute to keep the lettuce from getting soggy.

Ingredients:
Serves 2 (entree) or 4 (as a side)
4 cups chopped romaine lettuce (2 hearts)
1/2 sweet onion, such as Vidalia, finely sliced
1/2 cup finely sliced green pepper
1/2 cup chopped, seeded tomato
1/3 cup Swiss cheese, 2 slices
1/3 cup diced ham or 4 slices deli style (Black Forest ham is perfect)
2 boiled eggs
2 slices crispy bacon (optional)

Preparation:
1. Wash and dry the lettuce. Chop roughly or, alternatively, tear into bite sized pieces.
2. Peel the onion and cut in half. Slice finely and add to the lettuce.
3. Wash the green pepper. Cut the top off the pepper and remove the ribs and seeds. Cut in half and slice. Add to lettuce mixture.
4. Cut the cheese slices in half and stack, one on top of the other. Cut into 1/2" slices. Add to the lettuce.
5. Roll up a few slices of ham and slice finely into ribbons. Add to the salad.
6. Peel the boiled eggs and chop roughly. Top the salad with the boil egg and cooked, crumbled bacon if you are using it.
7. Cut your tomato in half then, over a bowl or the trash can, squeeze the tomato gently. This will remove most of the liquid and some of the seeds. Chop and add to the salad.
8. Serve chilled with Thousand Island, or your preferred, dressing.

Thousand Island Dressing:
1/2 cup mayonnaise
2 tablespoons ketchup
1 boiled egg, finely chopped
1 tablespoon pickle relish
2-3 drops Worcestershire sauce
fresh cracked pepper

Preparation:
1. Dice the boiled egg finely.
2. Mix the mayonnaise, ketchup, pickle relish, Worcestershire sauce and pepper together.
3. Add the egg to the mayonnaise mixture and mix to combine. Chill until ready to serve.

Chocolate Cupcakes!

Cake and Cupcake Part II:

For, me cupcakes are a reason to celebrate. This is not the same thing as saying, "cupcakes are perfect at celebrations" or "I always celebrate with cupcakes". No, not even close. Cupcakes, being the cutest and most adorable cakes around, are a reason to celebrate! On my list of most adorable things cupcakes rank somewhere between piglets, bears and spicy gumdrops.

This recipe was originally an old fashioned chocolate cake of undisclosed size. I found it huddled in a large Tupperware bin of clippings and magazine pages belonging to my Mother. She typed it out (on her typewriter) in High School and somehow it has managed to stick to her traveling menagerie of recipes since then. But, because I just had to make cupcakes I simply halved the recipe and stuck it in cups. It worked perfectly!

I'm not totally sure when my cupcake condition (and it is a condition) happened but it was some time after I graduated. It probably didn't help that within 6 months after moving home a gourmet cupcake shop opened up not a block from where I work and live. Then there was that trip to Charleston where King Street wooed me with, among other things, the cheekiest little cup-cakery, "Cupcake". My profile picture is of the two chocolate covered strawberry cupcakes I, my very sweet companion and one amiable seagull, enjoyed well before 11 am on a bench around the corner.

But what makes cupcakes cute!? Size for one. Shape, of course, but even a droopy, lumpy cupcake is still cute in a "only-your-mother-could-love it" sort of way; even the most unfortunate cupcake is still delicious! But, let's pretend all of our cupcakes turn out perfectly each and every time and we never have the need to frost away imperfections. How do you guild the lily that is the easiest, springiest chocolate cupcake? Let's start at the beginning. I don't expect any of you to have gone out and purchased that off-set spatula I told you about, much less a piping bag and very large star tip. So, let's start from the basics. Piping can be done with a Ziploc bag very cheaply and easily. I suggest a quart or freezer bag because they are heavier than sandwich bags and less likely to burst a seam and squirt out frosting. Doesn't that sounds cute, though?

Right, piping. I like to place the bag in a large mug or measuring cup and fill accordingly. Tilt the bag on a angle, so that a corner is pointing into the bottom of the cup, and fill it up. Seal the bag, leaving a small corner open to allow air to escape. I like to hold the bag in my non-dominant hand, twisting with the other hand until the icing is squeezed into the corner and conical in shape. Snip the corner of the Ziploc and you are ready to pipe. Applying pressure to the bag from the top pushes icing out of the "tip". Rocket science, yes?

If that piping bag sounds a bit too scary at this stage just use a butter knife to smooth the icing onto your cupcake. For a finished bakery appearance hold the knife almost parallel to the cupcake and skim the edge.

For the swirls: I put two drops of blue food coloring on opposite sides of a zip lock bag (repeat with red). Of course, this can be done with any colors. Also, bear in mind this is the super cheap, beginner way of piping a swirl frosting. That doesn't mean it is any less adorable! Fill the bag with frosting and then pipe a large swirl onto the cupcake. Always start from the outside and work towards the center. If you mess it up just smear a knife around the cupcake to give it a tie die effect. If you really botched it just pour some sprinkles onto a plate or into a bowl and press the cupcake into them, rolling your wrist slightly to coat the sides and edges. I can tell you from experience, there isn't anything that can't be fixed with sprinkles; except maybe really cute cupcake liners.

Makes 1 dozen
(You should have all of this in your kitchen already!)

1 cup flour, all purpose
2 tablespoons cocoa
1/2 cup cold water
1 teaspoon vanilla
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 cup mayonnaise

Preparation:
1. Preheat to 350 (325 if your oven cooks hot like mine). Line a muffin tin with cupcake liners.
2. Sift the dry ingredients.
3. Add the wet ingredients and mix until moistened. Using an ice cream scoop, fill the liners 3/4 full.
4. Bake the cupcakes for 15-20 minutes or until a toothpick (or very sharp knife) inserted into the center of the cupcake comes out clean. There should be no gooey residue left on it and the cupcake should spring back when gently tapped with your finger.
5. Cool the cupcakes before icing.